No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
