I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
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