you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
