We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
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