Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
