We're like a lot better than the average bears
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
