note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize