He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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