are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
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