Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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