I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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