I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
