Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
