What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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