It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Everclear isn't food dammit
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
