Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
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On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
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Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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