Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
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