Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize