thus making me awesome and them whores
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
