I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
