i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
