she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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