Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Dick very happy bro
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
