I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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