But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize