she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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