i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
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