yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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