she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
