That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
