the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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