Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba