I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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