Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
