I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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