The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
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After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
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I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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