I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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