I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize