So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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