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**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize
