You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
