I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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