Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
