No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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