Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
