So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
