OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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