dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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