i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize