I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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