sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Randomize
